Pretending to be who you don’t want to be

(21 May 2018) – Most of us are just regular, ordinary folk. We go about our lives doing the things we enjoy doing. We hang out with people we like hanging with. Those are the memorable things, the stuff we pay attention to. Nearly everything else is neither here nor there. It doesn’t matter if we like it or not, because it really doesn’t matter. Those are mundane occurrences, forgotten as soon as they are behind us.

The banality of everyday life is balanced by the excitement of special moments. We work all day at mind-numbing jobs to get a pay cheque and keep a roof over our heads. Then we relax in front of the television for a few hours in the evening and get out and about on the weekend doing something special, something that suits our fancy.

Most of us regular, ordinary folk don’t stray far from what we like. There’s others out there who do. People obsessed with things they don’t like. Others who spend their lives pretending to be the people they hate.

In the interests of transparency and full disclosure I’ll tell you one thing. For most of my life I’ve been a solid meat and potatoes person. Seventy years of a British diet made me the man I am. When I first heard there was such a thing as a vegan, I was curious. After a cursory glance I decided there was nothing wrong with a vegan meal that a pound of ground round couldn’t fix.

I didn’t realize I was being pulled onto a dietary slippery slope. The siren song of the vegan lifestyle drew me closer, luring me into a colourful garden of orange yams and purple eggplants. I started having a couple of vegetarian meals a week. Then it became a couple of meat meals. By now I’ve been out for two meals at Boon Burger on Quebec Street. They were good. Delicious even. It’s reaching the point where I must sneak into a carnivore closet whenever I want a ham and cheese sandwich.

What I’ve discovered about vegans is that they are obsessed with meat and dairy products. When you are in the grocery store, you can get vegan “neat balls”. You can get pseudo ground beef. You can fry up some “bacun” for breakfast and put a little “cheeze” with it. You can even cook up some tofu and have a vegan fried egg!

When you do a Google search for vegan recipes, or read the menu in a vegan restaurant, it is clear how sorely they miss the carnivorous world. This doesn’t make them bad people. On the contrary. For the most part they seem to be very nice people who care about the planet and the things living on it. I’d even trust one to babysit my grandchildren.

Who’s not so nice are the people who pretend to be what they are not. People who want to convince us they are actually the people they hate. I’m thinking of Conservatives like Doug Ford or his mentor, Donald Trump. They hate poor people. They hate working people. Yet they want us to believe they’re one of us. Ford claims to be against the elites but lives firmly among them. I haven’t looked it up, but there could be a page about Doug Ford in a Manual of Psychiatric Disorders. 

It is possible that one day I could become a vegan. It’s not possible that I could ever become a Conservative.

1 Comment

  1. Part of me wishes it were true that Doug Ford is a model for psychiatric disorders. Unfortunately like his idols he is a Prince among elite men (or perhaps a Baron railing against proponents of a Magna Carta). Like Justin Trudeau and Donald Trump he is pushing for a much simpler way of decision making inside his Dreamscape Empire. Greed and Patriarchy are the psychiatric order which has ruled for centuries. But enough word play. I am boggled that you might become a vegan. My only direct encounter with a radical vegan occurred maybe 20 years ago while I was enjoying a plate of steak, eggs and mushrooms at The Diana. He stood in front of me for at least a minute before announcing he was very disappointed to see me eating steak in public.My response was that its important someone work hard to keep some of the dead cows out of the landfill.
    PS. glad to read you are eating your veggies.

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